The deep fog reaching across swathes of the country caused some consternation this morning. This prompted a Government spokesperson to reassure the general public that all is well. She firmly quashed rumours that the fog was a cover for eldritch alien fog monsters.
“It would appear that some people have been reading too many comic books and watching late night showings of classic horror films while eating wheels of cheese.” Ms Irma deBunquer (spokesperson for Number 10) said. “There is no such thing as fog monsters, and if they existed – which they don’t – then I can reassure you that they would not be able to infiltrate the government. Which they categorically haven’t. Because they don’t exist. Honestly! Guides’ honour!”